Tag Archives: dissociation

nothing

Social media is a strange landscape, and my desire to share and my ability to open myself ebbs and flows. In anger or other moments of strong feeling, I fling myself into the arena. In moments of dissociation, in the … Continue reading

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The funeral

We feel your sorrow, they say we can’t imagine your pain, as they stare into my eyes and hug me I tell them I’m numb, actually sorrow is theirs I can’t feel, I say and they stare and stare as … Continue reading

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Rock

I feel iron gates close the moment he brings it up, I know where he is going with this, he is remembering what he said to me at thirteen, that never resonated, that he feels again now, in crisis, that … Continue reading

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On Pap smears, rape, and reclaiming the body

Last time I went in for a Pap smear, the panic started in the lobby.  I filled out the paperwork through blurred vision, closed my eyes, counted my breathing.  In, two, three, four, hold…. out, two, three, four, hold… the … Continue reading

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